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| Positivity: Pick Someone Every Day To Compliment |
Giving complements is something that comes naturally when someone does
something really great. For instance, if someone gets all dressed up for a big
night out, it is really easy to say, “You look great!” This kind of compliment
makes everyone feel good because the effort to look good on a big night is
accomplished and the praise is obvious. Of course, this is a situation when you
would compliment someone. When someone
makes and effort and succeeds, everyone wants to share in that success.
However, what happens when someone isn’t in a situation where an extra
effort is required? This situation is called daily living, and although most of
us make an effort every day, this effort goes largely unrecognized. This is
because it is also generally expected that day after day we will continue to
drudge along on our own without needing any encouragement.
And let’s face it. Giving compliments all of the time takes effort.
And so what if someone shows up to work on time every day? Isn’t this
what they get paid for? Is it really a cause for joy if someone does the
homework they were assigned? And isn’t keeping a clean house the minimum effort
that someone should put forward?
It is true that all of these efforts are just expected of us. In fact,
it would be weird if you went around complimenting people for every little
thing that they did every day. An employee certainly isn’t going to get a
compliment every time they come back to work from lunch on time simply because
they behaved like a normal person. And you might not always compliment someone
who gets straight A’s in school every time because they are naturally smart.
These kinds of compliments are redundant.
So how does giving compliments every day make you happier when they
don’t seem to be needed? Doesn’t it take a special occasion to warrant a
compliment? Like recognizing someone who made an “A” in school when they
usually make a “C”?
It would seem like this is the case, but compliments that make you
happier need to be given on a daily basis. And they are a little bit harder to
give than the ones that seem so obvious.
Give a compliment when they don’t expect it.
Let’s take the example of the person who always shows up on time for
work, but let’s say that once they get there that they don’t work as hard as
you do. Sound familiar? You may be late occasionally because you have other
worries, but once you are at work, you do a lot more than the others do. Feel a
little resentful because the boss doesn’t notice? Of course. Anyone would.
What do you do about it? Maybe you complain a little bit or complain a
lot, but the complaining doesn’t make the problem any better. It may not look
like it, but this is the perfect time to give a compliment. It may take some
effort, but the next time this person does their share of the work, thank them.
This may take a lot of humility, but thank them for the honest effort they put
in that day.
If nothing comes from this compliment, don’t be discouraged, because at
least you tried. However, you may find that this person may work just as hard
another day. You may even find out that
they feel just as under-appreciated as you do; they just expressed it in a
different way. You may even make a new friend at work that you can commiserate
with when the going gets tough for everyone.
This may or may not happen to you, but think about it. If you start
giving compliments when people don’t expect it, at the very least, you throw
them off their game. After a while of
giving compliments that people don’t expect, you will be surprised at how differently
people react to you. They will want to be around you more and also do things
for you because they know that you will appreciate their efforts.
Now that should make anyone at least a little bit happier.
See also: writeyourselfrich.net
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